Changing Your Mindset by Alexey Buchev

We all develop ourselves into certain models of thinking and behavior in life. These beliefs, however, are not life itself, but only our view of it, a matrix within which we start operating. Often this map-matrix starts managing our lives and we follow prescriptions that we don’t necessarily want to follow. At some point, we find ourselves in a situation living on models and prescriptions that do not work for us. Almost every problematic situation we face in life is caused by the conflict between the map we use and the reality — where we have a need that this map cannot adequately meet. The good news is that the map is subject to change, and reality responds to the changes — that is, we are able to develop other beliefs that serve us better in particular life situations. Interestingly, we often receive direct signs, which in many cases manifest very literally through the body. We can use techniques for rewriting a specific scenario which helps to change thinking through boundaries into thinking through opportunities. The change in the map-matix can make reality react in ways we wouldn’t expect and outcomes can be very different.

Imagine that you are experiencing a problematic situation. At this point, your mind is burdened with worries and most likely digs into the darkest parts of the problem. Before we can begin to think positively, we must learn to think and act differently. Without changing our map-matrix, attempts to change reality will resemble an attempt to put on pajamas over a winter coat — we become even more cumbersome and limited. In order to make an effective transition to a new reality, we need to stop handling the problem according to the way we have always handled it. It’s important to do something different, if you want to get a new result. Our task is to get out of obstructive thinking and enter a regime that allows our borders to expand and break down the barriers to mental models that prevent us from being happy.

Classical psychology deals seriously and in a standard way with problems – it defines them, explains them, analyzes them, with the idea that it will come to the solution. Instead, I suggest applying non-standard (frivolous fun) tasks in order to obscure the problematic logic, instead of nourishing it. That’s why it works! The idea is to get out of the logic of the problem, to stop digging into it, and then create a new scenario which does not have the negative consequences of the old option, but instead has clearly formulated positive consequences for our lives. Not only will you be able to see the situation in a new way, but you can expect unexpected developments and it will be better than anything you imagined.

Children have this wonderful ability to experience everything in connection with everything else, and as if it is a miracle. They have no problem solving things in new ways, creating free and qualitative new and, at the same time, effective interrelationships between themselves and the world. That’s what it is all about. When we begin to perceive ourselves and the world resourcefully through possibilities, not through limitations and deficiencies, then we can restore that primordial, living connection between us and the universe. Often times the change happens lightly, quietly and in an all-embracing way. More and more problems go away from our lives without even saying “goodbye”. At the same time, more and more different and enjoyable things begin to happen instead. This is truly an exciting and enjoyable experience, and a wonderful way of living in general. Our society has led us to believe that life is “ordinary,” ie. gray, joyless and painful most of the time, and a miracle is supernatural and only happens occasionally to the chosen ones. In fact, it is quite the opposite – life can be lived in joy as a great adventure. This is exactly what we do in the Life Can Be a Miracle seminars.

Author: Alexey Buchev, a Bulgarian psychologist
Translated by: Ivinela Samuilova, author of Life Can be a Miracle